Welcome, welcome, to our weekly chat about New Zealand’s favourite new guilty pleasure. Are you calm enough to discuss? In a show that’s taken such liberties with history, so much as to assert that Mary’s marriage to Francis would spark off an earache-initiated demise for our future King of France, it’s interesting to see the show finally address the ‘prophecy’ issue in a way that continues to play out like an AU fanfic about Mary Queen of Scots, her notso sickly husband and his bastard brother who totally existed.
This episode was rich in, well, everything; the soapy melodrama was amped up, supernatural undertones were pulled to the forefront once again and historical politics pulled the strings that kept our ships in place- all helping to set a tone so tumultuous you felt a bit like Francis at the end, falling to his knees in an almost comical fulfillment of prophecy.
You know that when a couple start the episode in bed all loved up that something’s going to tear into their happy bubble and bring it all crashing down around them. For Mary and Francis it happens to be ‘fate’. On team ‘Fate’ we have Queen Catherine and Nozzy (Nostradamus), and to some extent Diane who’s still trying to get Bash aboard the legitimacy train. Team ‘Frary’ (at this point) consists of King Henry- who’s super happy to hear that Mary Tudor is dying and everyone’s ready to back Mary’s play for the English throne- Clarissa and Mary’s ladies in waiting.
Bash, in meta fashion, is on team ‘AU AU AU’, that is if the world were different he’d get the girl and still have his bro too.
So the King is ready for Mary and Francis to finally tie the knot- heck he doesn’t even know they’ve rocked the boat. Giggity. And this sets Catherine into a rage, she’s ready to poison everyone to stop this unholy union that will be the undoing of her baby boy. Nozzy has another vision that foretells the death of one of Mary’s bff-ladies. And yes, it’s the one we have zero attachment to, if it had been Kenna I would have been relieved but Aylee’s death gave me no feels at all. I’m not sure if that makes me a monster or whether the writers intentionally set it up so that the first ‘regular cast member culling’ wouldn’t phase their audience too much.
Catherine finally decides that it’s time to come clean to Mary about why she keeps trying to sabotage her relationship with Francis. Only because Nozzy urges her to, she’s content to kill Mary off but the Nozmeister convinces her that the truth will set her free.
Kenna, so thirsty to be Henry’s one true mistress, gets burned when he tells her straight up that he’s never going to drop Diane because she’s the best he’s ever had. He didn’t say that, but he might as well have. Also, in her thirst, Kenna doesn’t realise the Priest who mistakes her for Diane has just shaded her. Like he just mistook you for someone old enough to have a fully grown son. Maybe that’s why the king will always go back to Diane? Double burn.
Speaking of burning, why’s Nozzy so mean to Clarissa? Sure, she’s somewhat responsible for Aylee’s death because she pushed her down the stairs but only because she would have died anyway, poisoned by the drink meant for Kenna. Kenna sees a cat lap some of the cup’s spilled contents and then sees it die. Ooooooh shit.
Isn’t it just perfect that while Bash is getting ready to run away, Mary’s also about to go on the run ‘fer the sake of her lurve!’ And so, timed most perfectly, as they’re riding out Francis comes running out too, in an effort to try to stop Mary from leaving. He sees her and Bash on their horses about to go a’galloping off together and as they do he falls to his knees, much like how he does in Nozzy’s visions making it look like Nozzy misread his own prophetic images.
– Anyone else feel shafted by how the ‘prophecy’ panned out? I felt a bit shafted by the fact that images that Nozzy saw of Francis supposedly ‘dying’ is suspiciously exactly the same as that final scene of Francis falling to his knees heartbroken from seeing his girl galloping away with his brother.
– King Henry telling Mary that Elizabeth will target Mary no matter if she makes a play for the English crown or not. Mary does, spoiler alert, die by Elizabeth’s orders…but only after she’s implicated in a plot against her.
– Megan Follows poisoning her bird though. That’s messed up.
– Until next week? Things continue to get dicey, and much more complicated.