!LIVEBLOG Reaction/Review POST! The Blue Rose 1×09 Suffer Little Children

The Blue Rose: Monday 9:30pm TV3

Type Jane type!

Krystle ya batch.

Ugh Derek Peterson care’s only about riding motorbikes and drinking, Charlie’s right.

Charlie, still trynna get his ins.

Of course Krystle’s gonna put her on port-o-loos.

BLUE ROSE TEAM MEETING! Everyone’s present. Well and good.

Peterson’s still a major suspect, yeh. Dodgy guy. Duh.

Bunny boiler? Felicity was caught driving under the influence on the night Rose died? Curious. Curious.

YUSS MORE VARSHA! But only because they need arrest details on Felicity the crazy wife.

“I’ll seduce Varsha and be back in time for Battlestar Galactica.”

Dude Monique’s dumb. She’s getting Catfished! Stop, just call MTV.

Deal struck because Ganesh is good with his hands. Awww yeah.

Back at the charity event the Bikers arrive!

Over to Varsha and Ganesh helping this week’s cause for concern, Monique. Wow Monique’s got an ancient computer.

The bad man’s at the charity event! The BAD MAN!!! He’s part of the Bikers!

Oh God Felicity.

Krystle still calls Linda the mental girl. Peterson likes the look of Linda doesn’t he? Oh damn he just put Krystle in her place.

Annnnnnd BOUNCED by Linda. Peterson’s barking up the wrong tree.

“Would you like a sausage.” “No I would not like a sausage.” COUGH. Is that true, Linda?


Ganesh is taking agers in the bathroom, because he’s getting the dirt on Monique’s catfish.

Linda and Grant, anyone ship it? Yeah, me neither. Bad man with the tattooed neck- Grant knows him and I bet by the end of the episode he’s going to wish he didn’t know him.

Ongoing association with the ride for life and Peterson’s sketchiness. Ugh. Helen. What’s your deal?

Wow $60,000 does this help Peterson sleep at night?

What’s Peterson saying to Charlie?

Bad Man = Karl Villiers. Awesome, Ganesh points out that it’s lame calling the Bad Man the Bad Man. Agreement.

Felicity is nice and normal until she goes apeshit on you.

Monique’s Catfish actually lives in Takapuna. Haha brilliant.

Simon and Jane, who’s shipping it? Me neither.

No Simon, she means Karl Villiers

Ah, Helen was a criminal lawyer. Bet she WAS paid in drugs.

Jane notices things that would be useful to the case of the missing puppies. Wait.

Catfish operates from an internet cafe. Oh man, awesome. Just playing some- what’s a game that guys go to internet cafes to play? Well playing that game and catfishing some chicks.

Sonya packed lunch, back to loving her. They’re on a stakeout.

Whoa shit, Catfish used his real photo? Sonya’s going to steal Catfish’s bike to get him out.

Jesus Linda what is your problem? Let me count the ways. Karl’s got his fingers in a few pies? More like he’s got his fist in a few- okay that went wrong. Grant didn’t have Rose killed. You read it here first. Heh.


Catfish ‘someone’ stole your bike! By someone I mean me (Sonya) and it’s in the back of my car. Ganesh you better have gotten the deets. And boom, Ganesh comes through. Sonya’s got a thing for Catfish, watch out he’s got a thing for well- everyone. And a penchant for trying to scam people.

Charlie sneaking up on Jane while she’s filing. Now niggle the info out of him. Ah, makes sense. Peterson’s helping Charlie’s pops out with funding for his lawyer.

BLUE ROSE GANG MEETING: Helen represented Villiers in 1998, when I was 10. They are old. Old as balls. Okay, not that old. Linda also doesn’t think Grant did it. Linda’s hotheadedness strike again and she’s out of there!

Grant’s turned up at Linda’s house to ‘talk’ about Linda’s accusations. I’m hoping they don’t reconnect- yeah I mean hook up. Especially since everyone’s convinced that Linda’s into chicks.

Brad from Hawaii – aka Catfish, is actually Mark I didn’t catch his last name or where he’s from but I’m going to keep calling him Catfish anyway. Damn 18 women on the go, from 6 different countries. Holy shmuck. Varsha, you need to tell Monique.

Subtle dig at Ganesh there from Varsha. Yeah Ganesh, Varsha’s a human being. Treat her better.

So they decide they’re going to set a honey trap. Nope that doesn’t mean they’re going to put honey on his door and wait for him to walk into it. That would be stupid.


Linda’s just showing Grant everything here. She’s trusting him with a bit here. Grant better not make us regret this. Grant do you understand how much she’s trusting you right now?

And now they’re all trying their hand at Catfishing. Setting up the bait for the trap. Sonya just leaves people about in her house? Break up letter from Catfish for Monique as written by Ganesh, I’m pretty sure it would be better to just tell her the truth. Ganesh is bringing Varsha to tears here. Damn Ganesh. Aw. AWWWWWWWW.

Beautiful shot of Auckland, man this show sure knows how to make Auckland look even more beautiful.

Receptionist who’s had like 5 lines, hi!

Krystle, why do you want to know Linda’s contact details? OH, Derek Peterson wants to talk to her ew. And give her his private number.

Yeah Derek Peterson wants Linda’s D. Linda’s not very subtle, but she’s not a moron. DO IT. TALK TO HIM. She’s so going to call him. Hahahahahahaha

Grant’s talking to Karl and- oh man is he going to outright, dude. Maybe Linda’s not the only unsubtle person about. Grant you’re only asking for trouble asking Karl about his whereabouts of Karl on the night of Rose’s death GAH ADS.

BONES AD just to remind me that I’m really behind. Ugh. Drink pump and make water- I mean make LIKE water. But you do make water. Hahahaha

Grant isn’t that stupid. Heh. Yeah well Nina’s missing now and I bet I know what’s happened to her. Also, it was in the promo but still. Even if I didn’t know.

Whoa creepy, Karl picked her up from school and brought her home. Don’t talk to stranger Nina, no matter what they say about being friends with your parents.

Karl shut your trap you piece of vermin trash. Grant if you give up Linda’s name- oh good.

Catfish took the bait! Catfished, for Catfished haha. Mark Columbine from Mairangi Bay. You certainly CAN be anyone over the internet. I’m Bob on some site. Bob Cheney from Texas. It’s all a bit of a laugh.

Sonya laying down the law, being the NZ division of (not so)Anonymous. Why, Catfish? Um, you’re scamming people out of their money, that’s why.

Ugh, Monique, Mata says you’re dumb.

Ganesh and Varsha, do you ship it? Yeah, I do. Aww and she got the information for him. Hahahahahahahahhahaha Sonya charged the room to Catfish’s credit card and waxed alco-ma-hol from the mini-bar. Brilliant.

Felicity was being abusive- but she’s got an alibi. However it puts Simon back on the radar because he’s got 9 hours unaccounted for before picking Felicity up from the station.

Grant’s going away with Nina, probably best. He didn’t give up Linda’s name at least. Linda loves you too ratbag. *Sadface*

Holy shacks Linda’s meeting up with Peterson!!!

END EPISODE. Feature length episodes from next week onward! And DAMN THINGS ARE HEATING UP! Like guys, one of you could be doing the killer. Just uh, putting that out there.

Special Mentions:

– I’m glad that no children actually suffered in the making of this week’s episode.

– Reaction post/liveblog over and out. What were YOUR reactions? Here are some tweets!


8 thoughts on “!LIVEBLOG Reaction/Review POST! The Blue Rose 1×09 Suffer Little Children

  1. Guys I think we need to Skype-chat next week’s FEATURE LENGTH EPISODE THAT STARTS TEN MINUTES EARLIER (thanks for that heads up TV3), you have hilarious thoughts that need to be shared in real time. REAL TIME I TELL YA.


    1. Hahaha, Mata and I were talking about doing a open Google Hangout maybe but then we realized that we are pretty ugly, then we started crying. Now we are in our respective rooms cry singing to Adele. Thanks man! Just thanks!




      2. Dude, you’re seriously gonna pin that on me? That’s cold. Lorraine must be feeling pretty hot though. (LORRAINE ARE YOU OK, ARE YOU OK, ARE YOU OK LORRAINE?!)

        I actually meant like Skype typing chat, I feel as though there’d be way too much stuff to say and so my mouth wouldn’t be able to follow my brain as fast as my fingers.


      3. Right, that sounds fantastic. Will set up something more close to the date.

        Mata is too busy straightening her hair to reply. She thought it was a video chat and was trying to be less ugly by next Monday. I have told her the good news that no-one wants to see her face. She is happy now and is singing “The Thong Song”. Yeah, I don’t know why . . .


        P.S Thong, Thong, Thong, Thong. Damn it Mata stop getting the song in my head.



        AIN’T NOBODY SINGING THE DAMN THONG SONG what kind of outdated- I don’t even. You’re in the shun box bro- until I decide you’re…no longer in the shun box.

        Ain’t nobody got time fo dat.

        In all seriousness a skype-chat of next week’s ‘feature length’ episode should be good! Live-blogging the episode is so much more fun than actually reviewing it afterwards haha yeah I’m exceedingly lazy.


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